Surprising as it may seem....
this is one of my favorite jokes.... and I could never quite remember it. I finally came across it on the web in its entirety.
KTG and I, probably due to our incredibly warped minds, changed it slightly in a way that made sense only to us as we retold it. Now all we have to do is say our new punchline and we laugh hysterically.
But here is the joke in its original form:
"Harry was delighted when he found a young woman who accepted his proposal of marriage as he was sensitive about his wooden leg and a bit afraid no one would have him. In fact, he couldn't bring himself to tell his fiance about his leg when he slipped the ring on her finger, nor when she bought the dress, nor when they picked the time and place. All he kept saying was, 'Darling, I've got a big surprise for you,' at which she blushed and smiled bewitchingly.
The wedding night came and went, and the young couple were at last alone in their hotel room. 'Now don't forget, Harry, you promised me a big surprise,' said the bride.
Unable to say a word, Harry turned out the lights, unstrapped his wooden leg, slipped into bed, and placed his wife's hand on the stump.
'Hmmmmm,' she said softly, 'that IS a surprise. But pass me the Vaseline and I'll see what I can do!'"
Our new punchline: "Bend over Eva, I'm comin' with the stump."
As it turns out, Eva is the name of KTGs Grand-M. How we twisted this joke so horribly is beyond me. But we think it's funnier.
KTG and I, probably due to our incredibly warped minds, changed it slightly in a way that made sense only to us as we retold it. Now all we have to do is say our new punchline and we laugh hysterically.
But here is the joke in its original form:
"Harry was delighted when he found a young woman who accepted his proposal of marriage as he was sensitive about his wooden leg and a bit afraid no one would have him. In fact, he couldn't bring himself to tell his fiance about his leg when he slipped the ring on her finger, nor when she bought the dress, nor when they picked the time and place. All he kept saying was, 'Darling, I've got a big surprise for you,' at which she blushed and smiled bewitchingly.
The wedding night came and went, and the young couple were at last alone in their hotel room. 'Now don't forget, Harry, you promised me a big surprise,' said the bride.
Unable to say a word, Harry turned out the lights, unstrapped his wooden leg, slipped into bed, and placed his wife's hand on the stump.
'Hmmmmm,' she said softly, 'that IS a surprise. But pass me the Vaseline and I'll see what I can do!'"
Our new punchline: "Bend over Eva, I'm comin' with the stump."
As it turns out, Eva is the name of KTGs Grand-M. How we twisted this joke so horribly is beyond me. But we think it's funnier.
2 Comments:
At 3:58 PM, Juicy said…
Even funnier, KTG's Grand-F had one leg that was amputated...hence THE STUMP!
At 9:31 PM, Queen of the Universe said…
I don't know why I keep forgetting that part.
But it's still funny and still makes me laugh.
love you muchly,
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