Friday, August 26, 2005

The Results Are In...

I really am old. Old and Dull. Meat and potatoes boring.

Twenty years ago the results of this test would have been soooo different.

It would have been way more exciting like imported caviar & champagne. Or something exotic like braised hummingbird tongue.

Under glass. Hand fed. While driving down the highway. In a police car. Going 70mph. Backwards. While wearing nuthin' but sunglasses and 'cuffs. And a smile.

Those were the days.

Apparently what was bold and adventurous then is now considered normal. Expected. Or worse, passé

As it is... this is me now. I'm as surprised as you. Apparently I enjoy:

regular, plain old sex -- boring to some, yet you seem to love it. Hey, do whatever pleases you!
(and of course your significant other)


I'll consider this part of my life as rehearsal for the convent.

Excuse me while I go finish my housework, put away the laundry, supervise homework and start on tonight's dinner. We're having meat and potatoes. I just might cry.



2 Comments:

Post a Comment

<< Home





As the owner of this blog, I assume no responsibility for any errors, or inaccuracies, in its content or judgement. I am not a doctor or lawyer, nor do I portray one on TV. Void where prohibited. Use only as directed. Batteries not included. Caution: May Be Hazardous to Your Health. Accessories sold separately. Not to be used by children under 3. May cause drowsiness. No animals were injured in the making of this website. Do not operate heavy machinery. No shirt, No shoes, No service. Do not overinflate. Stay back 300 feet. Recommended by 9 out of 10 dentists who chew gum. Caution: Makes wide turns. Keep out of reach of children. For external use only. Parental guidance suggested. Do not use during last three months of pregnancy. Objects may be smaller than they appear. Simulated picture. Sold for the prevention of disease only. Artificially flavored. All rights reserved. Not for human consumption. Stops at all railroad crossings. Contents under pressure. Best when used by expiration date. We reserve the right to refuse service to anyone. No smoking. Prices may vary. Configuration subject to change. Plus tax, title and license. Unauthorized duplication is prohibited. Monitor sold separately. Found to be only 99.9% effective as a contraceptive. Plus shipping and handling. Do not freeze. Your mileage may vary. Close cover before striking. Please rewind. Not used for purpose intended. Adults only. This tag is to be removed only by consumer. No carryouts. You agree to these Terms and Conditions by using this site. Available for a limited time only at participating locations. Not responsible for lost or stolen articles. Discontinue if redness or swelling occurs. Not animal tested. FDA approved. Unattended children will be given candy and a free puppy. Contents may settle during shipping. Stir occasionally. Do not discontinue use unless directed by your physician. Keep out. Do not use if seal is broken. For chronic continued constipation consult your doctor. Store at room temperature. Results may vary. Shake before using. Flammable. Patent pending. Any resemblance to real persons, living or dead, is purely coincidental. Due to the graphic content, parental discretion is advised.